The word ‘austerity’ is weightier than it used to be - isn't it? Where
it might have once summoned up images of ration books, dour Scottish aunties
and paintings of seated men resting hands on a passing Dobermans, today I find
myself settling on different images: the EU flag; the colour grey;
middle-aged Greek women in tight knee-length skirts holding black hankies to
their care-worn faces; George Osborne's face; David Cameron’s face; a particularly grotesque cartoon
depicting David Cameron as a big pink high-speed train; the coffee cup I used
this morning; a particularly eye-popping Mary Katrantzou dress; my future
career as fashionista….
My attention span is short.
But no matter what the associations (and no matter where
they lead us), January is always going to be a particularly sucked-in month and
this year maybe there’s just no way of making lemonade out of the broken eggs. Some
people get creative and start inventing new ways to twist the arms of their
pennies (perhaps you’ve gone beyond pinching). Me, I give up and give in. In a
very pro-active, determined and deliberate way, mind. One substantial shop when
I returned to the barren wasteland that is Oxford in early January and my
freezer was full - there was no further need of releasing any more of my
borrowed cash into the world. Why spend what you haven’t got, when you cannot spend what you haven’t got, eh? But
it was only later I realised I was planning on cutting back
not just my eating out, but all my culinary creativity too. It’s at these sorts
of times when I really relish The Plain Bowl Of Pasta dinner, The Lump Of
Cheese And Apple lunch and, of course, the eventual consumption of Thing In The
Freezer I Didn’t Ever Really Feel Like Eating In The First Place. With the echo of Austerity all about us, and drummed into me on a daily basis by the supremely
depressing Today programme, I too imagine myself feeling the burn of economic
downturn and, as a result, turn down a path of truly dire meals.
Except, they’re not really dire meals at all. I just like
the idea of them being dire in their
no-frills, near-masochistic lack of seasoning selves. Tonight, for example, a
perfectly lovely vegetable and chorizo concoction that technically comes under
the heading of ‘Things In The Freezer I Didn’t Ever….’ etc etc. Instead of
wasteful and waist-expanding amounts of rice or potato, I thought bread and
thinly-spread margarine might make a good accompaniment, as well as chiming with
the times.
Many squirm at the thought of margarine. And I was one of
them up until 31st of December 2011, but now we’re in Austerity
Month, it’s ok and I’ve even remembered why I used to like it so much. It was
another one of those normal things you take for granted in your childhood. It
tastes of after-school hunger being sated in front of Newsround. Now I think
about it, ever since I read the description of Miss Honey giving Matilda tea,
margarine has had a romantic attraction. BUT only if thinly-spread.
It seems really it’s the Austerity mind-set that appeals to
me: and perhaps others too? Lucky am I in my ivory tower and I wouldn’t want to
be glib about real and horrible economic fan-hittings. But it is nice to feel
at one with the nation, nay Europe, as you reach for the 5kg pack of pasta and
a saucepan.
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